Dear Dr. Smith,
I am a man who attends church and have been married for over 30 years and have never been faithful not even for a day in my marriage. I have done everything to destroy my family and was successful. I have taken things on credit card in my wife’s name and refused to pay the bills. My wife was sued and my lover told me I should not pay the bills and I did not. My wife is in trouble for it right now. Pray for me to have a heart. I am evil towards my family. Help me. I have had over 30 affairs and contracted herpes, but I have not told any of my lovers.
Dear Heartless Husband,
I am glad you have reached out for help, but before any help can come your way, there are some things you must do for yourself.
1. Tell your wife that you have herpes
2. Pay all bills with interest that you have amassed in your wife’s name.
3. Tell all your “so called lovers” that you have herpes
4. Get medical help for your herpes (unfortunately you will have it for life)
5. Beg your wife to forgive you and repent of your evil actions towards her.
6. Dump the lover/s that you have and start being a family man (If your wife still wants you)
7. Go down in sackcloth and ashes, repent of your sins and beg God for mercy and forgiveness.
The fact that you have reached out to me is an indication that you are at the bottom of the well. Sometimes we have to get there before our evil ways become apparent. You have hurt your wife so badly that it may take more than 30 years to heal her pain, but for the grace of God. If you do the seven things that I have recommend above it will show that you have a heart and you are willing to be led. If you don’t, then, it does not matter how much I pray for you, the Lord will not hear. As He said in His word, “If I regard iniquity in my heart, the Lord will not hear me” (Psa 66:18) So if you keep the iniquity, the prayer will not work.
The gall of your “lover” to tell you not to pay the debts you have put on your wife’s credit card. Let her know that it is just a matter of time; her day will come. At the same time; that's not an acceptable excuse for you. No one can make you decide. Regardless of what was said, you are responsible for your own action.
Finally, you definitely need to go for professional counseling. It could be that you are a sex maniac, a narcissist, or suffers from an obsessive-compulsive disorder. I will pray that God will help you to do the right thing before you further wreck your life.